It's not Him, it's you.

You know when you're watching one of those sappy romantic comedies and the couple breaks up? One doesn't want to devastate the other so they say "oh, it's not you, it's me?" We hear that over and over and over again.

You know what I think? Spiritually speaking in our relationship with God, he is saying, "It's not me, it IS you." You've had it all backwards and you are the reason that this relationship isn't working. 

Let me back up. We had a girls' Bible study last night on the first three chapters of John. We talked about how we could use that to teach someone who doesn't really know Christ about where he came from, who he is and what he does.  It got me thinking specifically about chapter 3. 

There's a passage in the third chapter about Nicodemus. He's part of the Sanhedrin (aka the religious leadership).  He goes to see Jesus because he wants to know more about following him....but he goes at night. If his friends from the Sanhedrin knew what he was up to, that he was a fan of this carpenter from Galilee, they'd ask questions and they might even persecute him. See, Nicodemus didn't want to be inconvenienced  by Jesus, but he wanted all the benefits that came with it.  He wanted to keep his relationship a secret so that no one would know. For Nicodemus, it would cost him everything. Well God tells us that if we deny him before man, he will deny us in Heaven.  Jesus doesn't want you to be a fan. He wants you to be a wholehearted follower - and sometimes that means that we won't be well liked or respected. If you're going to be in a relationship with God, it has to be public. Proclaim it, live it, don't be ashamed of it. In our world's terms, tweet it, make it Facebook official, tell your girlfriends or tell your buddies. Make Him known.

In a passage from Kyle Idleman's book Not a Fan. He writes this: 

"There is no way to follow Jesus without him interfering with your life. Following Jesus will cost you something. Following Jesus always costs something...it's a twenty four hour a day commitment that will interfere with your life. That's not the small print, that's a guarantee." (Ch 2, a Decision or a Commitment?)

So what has Jesus cost you? If he hasn't cost you much and you haven't let him interfere in your life, I'd venture to say you're not really following Jesus, you're just a fan. People who don't want to take their relationship to the next level and the next level are people who are letting themselves get in the way of knowing Jesus.  He's not holding anything back from us - we hold ourselves back from him. 

I'm guilty as charged. I've done this. I admit that. I have not been willing to fully commit to God in the past because I was too afraid I would lose my family who are not Christians, I feared not being good enough, knowledgeable enough. I didn't want to leave the "comforts of home" or the safe circle of friends that I've developed relationships with because friendships take work. I was selfish. I didn't see the relationship I have with God for what it CAN BE, only for what I thought it needed to be. 

I'm working on this. I'm prayerfully going through a program that will help me understand what I can do to make my relationship with myself stronger so I can have a better relationship with God, and other people. I've allowed God to change my surroundings, circumstances and plans as he sees fit - and it's been incredible to stand in the midst of everything he can do for us, with us and around us because He loves us. 

God is committed to the relationship he has with you. Are you a follower - or just a fan? It's decision versus commitment and the choice you make will change everything.  

The Pride Problem.

Tonight, I was talking with a few friends about pride.  I know it's a touchy subject, but if I'm correct it is also something we all deal with at some point or another.  Pride is a disease...it eats at us and makes us feel invincible, but if so, for all the wrong reasons.  It disarms our ability to do greater things and love other people because we are too consumed with loving ourselves. Almost everything, I would argue, becomes an internal discussion of "what can I get out of this?" or "how will this make me look better?" Pride does not do what we think it should. We look at it as a way of seeming confident, but sometimes the aroma is more arrogant because it is masking what we really feel.

The times I have seen pride most prevalent in my life are the times that I am most unwilling to admit my own weaknesses, but quick to point them out in others.  I'm not suggesting that it's wrong to lovingly point out pride to a fellowman - but when it is only to ignore the fact that you are equally as prideful as him, that's where it gets hazy. So why? Why be prideful - after all, Jesus says in Luke 18:14 that everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but he who humbles himself will be exalted. Who then would choose pride over exaltation? Any ill-reasoned man. See, he is also the man who thinks from this notion that pride can lead to exaltation. But, he lacks the focus on what Jesus says here - you can't have your pride cake and eat it too. God cannot be mocked.

Pride creeps in. It's not something that just appears and you can recognize it. If that were the case, none of us would have a pride problem.  I know for me, the cause of my pride was fear and laziness. First, I feared what I would find if I faced my pride and admitted that I was weak...me, weak, never! Besides that, I was lazy. Dealing with pride took  work. It took an understanding of who I am compared to God, and it put me in my place again. Fixing a pride problem requires humility (the opposite of pride) to acknowledge that it, your pride, exists. Furthermore, it then requires your willingness to do something about it. No one said it would be easy, but without it, it's not a very fulfilling life, I learned that.

So what's causing you to be prideful? How does that hinder you from choosing to live a more meaningful life instead of comparing yourself to others, and others to you? What can you to serve instead of being served? Be a blessing.